Ron Paul Hates Him Some Food Safety Regulations

Ron Paul, the cantankerous old man that makes John McCain seem “lucid and well put-together,” held a personal GOP convention today (for FREEDOM!) and gave a long acceptance speech, which puts him one up on Mitt Romney, who probably will never get an acceptance speech at this rate. In any event, Ron Paul had full control of the political side of the news cycle and decided to use it by splitting his time between hating on the only thing keeping America from economic ruin, and explaining how much better we’d be without food standards.

Wait, what? Yes, Ron Paul’s vision of American freedom may not include abortion but it sure as shit includes eating mass-produced, salmonella-riddled foodstuffs. Particularly milk, which must be Pasteurized before it crosses state lines (it may be raw within states, depending on state laws) because most of us remember that Louis Pasteur was a scientific genius who saved people from virulent pathogens by treating milk. Even the most well-reasoned “real milk” people seem to forget that the point of federal laws are to prevent mass-commercialization of untreated milk. Says one site, quoting a British official, “the human race existed long before Pasteur was heard of.” True…and the human race also existed with cows in their backyard instead of 2,000 miles away dependent on travel (across state lines, perhaps?) and multi-day storage. Because maybe…just maybe…the civilizing impulses that moved most of us into cities and invented refrigerators so not all of us had to raise our own milk led to the growth of pathogens in the milk that requires us to Pasteurize it. (Or not drink it at all.)

But in Galt’s Gulch, where Ron Paul’s brain lives, people deserve the right to consume pathogens if they feel like it. And to hell with health insurance because you should let people die, even if they are close friends and advisers.

If you want raw milk…buy a cow and milk it every morning and drink it all by the evening. If not, drink Pasteurized milk so you don’t die. Or frankly don’t if you think stupid stuff like “let’s adopt the gold standard.”

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