Presidential Debate Drinking Game — You Know You Need One

I just finished drafting an article for my friends over at Above the Law setting forth a drinking game for tonight’s debate. But as you might expect, that game is slanted toward their legal audience. Over here I’m willing to get into a few other issues. So I’m going to encourage people to head over to ATL to see those rules (UPDATE: This link works now). And add them to the rules provided below.

So during tonight’s liveblog, join us with some drinks and we’ll all play together.

Unless otherwise indicated, take a drink every time these are mentioned:

First off, from my ATL article

Each new question — Tonight’s format features six 15-minute sessions based around a question each. At the start of each new session you should salute everyone in the room (unless you’re drinking alone…like a champ!). No word on whether or not a politically themed “ring girl” will trot onstage with a placard to announce each new round. If there is, it’ll probably be Madeleine Albright.

1%, 47%, 99%, 100% — Ah the big guns of percentages. I’m also proposing a separate shot when and if they “shoot the moon” and successfully say all 4.

Any other percentageFinish your drink. If there is a detailed tax discussion, we’re all dead.

A swing state (other than debate host Colorado) is mentioned — Ohio, Florida, Virginia, Nevada, Iowa, or North Carolina. Whenever they get mentioned or we hear about a mythical person the candidate met there we get drinking.

Obamacare as a good thing — Romney will derisively call it “Obamacare,” sure. But will that term be used positively?

Romneycare — If Obama goes there we’re in for some fireworks.

Romney’s missing tax returns — I doubt Obama would launch this attack at the risk of seeming “unpresidential” but Lehrer may raise it.

A tax shelter other than Bermuda, Cayman Islands, Switzerland — We know the big ones. If another one is mentioned you should have a drink before checking your map (note: if you have an iPhone with the new operating system, don’t bother — the map won’t tell you where anything is any way).

Reverend Wright — I would have thought this was over with, but then last night happened.

Todd Akin — If he comes up, Jim Lehrer has ways of shutting that down.

Benghazi!!! — Or anything Arab Spring related. Tonight is the domestic debate, so it shouldn’t come up. But I’ve got to think the Romney campaign is itching to get that out there.

George Romney — Mitt loves bringing up his dad. If we hear him name checked tonight, get to drinking.

Lenore RomneyFinish your drink. She doesn’t come up as often. Probably because she’s an unreliable surrogate.

Bain — I’m actually interested to know who will raise the subject first. Romney might try to short-circuit any attack by talking favorably about Bain first. But he probably won’t.

Chug! Chug! Chug!

BaneFinish your drink.

SnookiJust because.

Saul Alinsky — If Gingrich were here, he’d constantly invoke the image of the late community organizer that taught Barack Obama to be a dirty socialist.

Mormonism — Finish your drink. Romney has meticulously avoided mentioning his religion this whole cycle.

Olympics — Oh dear god. If Romney lapses into touting his experience running the Winter Olympics as a qualification for the presidency again there isn’t enough liquor in the world to quell my creeping feeling of despair for the Republic.

Sports — I like having this one in here because whenever it happens it’s so awkward you need to drink. In an effort to humanize the candidates, some moderators invite sports commentary and it’s always horrible.

Jim Lehrer meltsdown and delivers the Howard Beale speech verbatim — Thank all that is holy to you that you lived long enough to witness this.

Other suggestions? Put them in the comments!

1 comment for “Presidential Debate Drinking Game — You Know You Need One

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